1:30pm~Intro To Wall Part Deux
Feeling not too bad today. I am pumped to get back on that wall and build me up some strength. Our teacher today was SAM who I had not yet met. Like virtually every person I have met at Yoga Public so far, she too is lovely and encouraging. It’s good to experience different teachers, for a different experience will be had, which is important when doing daily practice. I felt I could really tackle the wall today, this been my second time and all:) The class was similar to last week’s though it felt harder? In whatever class I am taking I consciously ‘pick out’ a part of the practice that I find the most challenging, then make it my goal to ‘conquer’ it. This week the goal was to find the strength to hold my body upright, arms flowing upwards, then down and so on.. Can’t remember the name of this sequence but its a toughy lemme tell ya. I feel I need all my bodily strength and stamina to work in unison, in order to accomplish this feat. So class continued, warm up done…here we go. Bring it on I said in my head, Bring it on! And so it was…and then some. Unfortunately whatever strength and stamina I do have ( including my reserves ) ‘booked it’, right out of the studio and fast. “We’ve got Nothin” my mind informed me….and so with disappointment I did what I was able to do, and finished the class. My ego or false sense of ‘where I’m at’ fitness-wise came to me front and center, gave me a dirty look and walked away. Shit.
Lesson learned today was this: Many a day will need to be put in to reach these ‘in-practice’ goals. Yes, it felt like defeat today, though I choose to take it as a mini battle ‘lost’, one that I will revisit each week until I win. Some battles may have been lost on certain days, but the war of course is far from over. Using analogies like war probably doesn’t seem like the right context in reference to Yoga and it’s not; The war I am waging is not with Yoga but with my illnesses. I have picked up my wounded self and throughout these 30 + days, am attempting to rehabilitate my body and find, what I believe to be, a healthier me within.