11:45 am~Physio Logic Lower Back~
Still sick today, though not as bad as yesterday and last night. Pretty difficult not to cough and cough during class, which is why focusing on my breathing is so crucial. I felt really grumpy as I entered this practice today, though began to feel better….mentally that is, which is good for I felt like I had hit THE wall. I’m angry because every single time I have ever tried to better my health, it seems like a rainstorm of sh*t seemed to be present. There just always was something that attempts to throw me off. In the past this ‘throwing’ always occurred…successfully. After beating myself up, I would proceed to the excuse making segment, with something like ‘well I guess it was bad timing’ or something lame like that; The disappointment in myself never really left me, truth be told. That Was Then This is Now, something I remind myself of today, especially when looking back on this last month. I have experienced the effects of withdrawal, menstruation and now a badass cold (these, plus my injection days, usually land me in horizontal land for a good 4-5 days). What the norm has always been in these cases, a.k.a how I’ve ‘dealt’ with these was much worse, to a certain extent then it has been….as of late. Hmmm. Not downing pain meds is the only new kid on the block, the others sadly are monthly visitors. The point here, that needed to be said, to me myself and I is this…You did it kid, you got thru it, so there!
Now stop feeling grumpy.
These are the thoughts I thought during my class today. I’m pretty sure we are supposed to ’empty our minds’ concentrate on our breathing and zone everything else out. In time I’m sure I’ll be able, but for now I need to battle my past and present…and rise above them. As I have mentioned, Yoga is but one part of what will make up this, my newly sought healthier self. I have not been naive to think that other doors and avenues would not present themselves to me, for it is my ultimate belief that when one consciously tries, at anything, this energy sends out ‘invitations’ and doors begin to open.
After class I spoke with Leslee, my lovely calming and encouraging Physio Logic teacher, about my recent exploration into Ayurvedic Nutrition. I had gone over to my neighbours home to inquire about food, recipes etc.. for he is BEYOND amazing when it comes to food and health. He passed on some books to me and so I began to read. Food is a whole other blog I suppose, but something that needs to be incorporated into this, my overall ‘Do Over’ Health Year. So back to Leslee. She took me after class to meet with another instructor, whom I had not yet met Adrienne, to chat about…well I wasn’t sure. Ends up, here’s a lovely example of a door ‘ajar’, that Adrienne has her Masters in nutrition and is certified as an Ayurvedic Lifestyle Counsellor. I turned to Leslee and smiled. ‘Shockingly’ Adrienne is having a Ayurvedic Workshop this coming weekend. Sigh….How can I be grumpy now? I’ve always felt I can create greatness during this life of mine. The mucky mucks in the way, always, have been my health and food issues. Step One: Heal Thy Body…Check~Step Two: Nourish Thyself…TBC